Hi everyone,
I hope all is well. Happy 2011, by the way. This last year has been an interesting one for me. It has taken me in new directions with my writing. This will be the year where I see if those things pan out. I hope they do.
Hope itself is a strange beast. It seems we can't live without it, but sometimes it really has the power to gnaw at one's consciousness. If we believe something is possible and we want it, then it is natural to hope for it.
I had no hope of winning the latest lottery jackpot, because I didn't have a ticket. The drawing, numbers, it all passed by me without a thought because I didn't have a possibility of winning. Once a possibility exists, hope for what I want grabs my insides and doesn't seem to let go until I hear some sort of conclusion that takes that possibility away.
I'm afraid this whole process is not real friendly on my poor nerves. I never thought I was a nervous person until I became a writer. Before I began this career, the only thing that could make my insides flutter was a really large roller-coaster. Now it seems the feeling of having my heart in my throat stays with me all the time.
I don't want hopes dashed, so I find myself musing on the very minimal good outcome, but I can't keep my mind from fantasizing about the possibilities of something greater. No matter what, the whole thing scares me a little. My heart is on the line.
The only recourse is to keep faith, and keep hope alive as long as I can.
Happy reading,
Jess
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3 comments:
I know what you mean about your nerves. I constantly question what the heck I'm getting myself into by querying my novel. But I love to write, and I like it when other people enjoy my work. I'd like to get it out there for even more to read. Still, the chance of actually succeeding scares the crap out of me.
I commented on your book on my blog (http://stacysrantings.blogspot.com) today. It's something I'm trying out and you were lucky to be the first of the year. Hope you don't mind! :)
When something matters, you have to hope for it, or else you give up. At least that's how it works for me; when I stop hoping, I give up. {lop-sided smile}
{HUGS}
Anne Elizabeth Baldwin
Wow, thanks. I'll go check it out.
And insightful as always, Anne.
Jess
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